Below i have my uni personal statement.. if any one could help proof read it for me and make any suggestions i would be most grateful thanks…
Why do I want to go on to higher education? Well, ever since I started secondary school at the age of eleven I have always wanted to pursue towards further education at university. Originally I wanted to become a Primary school teacher but since taking part in a lot of work experience in that field, my mind was suddenly made up that that this in fact was not what I wanted to do for the rest of my life. I since have gained a great interest in the marketing industry, and I have come to notice that there are mass opportunities in the market, which has yet to be exploited, and I in the future want to do exactly that. I believe it would challenge my more creative side as well as testing my theoretical skills. I’m particularly interested in the more creative advertising side of marketing and the psychology behind it.
I’m very business minded and I have many ideas, which I can expand on in the future. But before I do so I want to be more knowledgeable about the marketing industry, because if I do go into this field of work then I want to know what type of characteristics I need to build on in order to be successful in whatever I do in the future.
My auntie is also part owner of a family business, so I have experienced business throughout my life and I believe this has contributed to my passion towards this subject. I have just recently undergone two weeks work experience at my aunties business. Here I helped to create leaflets and posters in order to reach out to the local and wider community. I found this thoroughly interesting and I now want to gain a much deeper insight into the marketing sector in order to pursue a career in the industry in the future.
In October I returned from a 2 ½ month voluntary project in Kenya run by a government scheme called platform2. The aim of the trip is to provide 18-25 year olds the opportunity to visit a developing country and get involved with global issues of justice and poverty. Whilst in Kenya I lived with a local family for the ten week duration and worked on an ongoing conservation project in order to help conserve the eco system by improving the livelihoods or communities adjacent to the forest through an environmentally sustainable income. This experience has undoubtedly broadened my perspective of the world. It has been portrayed to me that out in Kenya everyone was trying to help one another get by, they were all in the same boat. Here, most people are trying to just get in their own boat and sail their own course. Over there they know that if they don’t build a boat together, they sink. Volunteering in Kenya in an underprivileged community has undoubtedly developed my life skills and fostered the creativity within me. It has nurtured my ability to be flexible in changing conditions, and adapt and adjust to new environments and cultures. Platform2- ‘Some People wait for change to happen, other people volunteer’
All my experiences have made me keen to broaden my knowledge and given the chance I will do so with full dedication, determination and continuous persistence as I am a motivated, sophisticated and charismatic individual who believes you only get one chance to make a first impression and my recognition would be by accomplishing my objective which is to obtain a degree in the marketing field and make myself realise that I have worked towards my potential which thus will be the basis of my success in the future.
Please let me know if this works for you. I removed a bit of unneeded phrasing. You’ve made your points clearly, and I wish you success!
Why do I want to go on to higher education? Ever since I started secondary school at the age of eleven I have wanted to pursue further education at university. Originally I wanted to become a primary school teacher, but after much work experience in that field, I realized that this was not what I wanted to do. Instead, I have developed a great interest in the marketing industry, where I have noticed massive opportunities yet to be exploited; this is where I belong. I believe the industry would challenge my more creative side as well as test my theoretical skills. I’m particularly interested in the more creative advertising side of marketing and the psychology behind it.
I’m very business minded and have many ideas which I can expand on in the future. But before I do so I want to be more knowledgeable about the marketing industry; if I go into this field of work I want to know the characteristics I need to build on for success in this field.
My auntie is also part-owner of a family business, so I have experienced business throughout my life; I believe this has contributed to my passion towards this subject. I have just recently undergone two weeks’ work experience at her business. I helped to create leaflets and posters in order to reach out to the local and wider community. I found this thoroughly interesting and I now want to gain a much deeper insight into the marketing sector.
In October I returned from a 2 ½ month voluntary project in Kenya run by a government scheme called Platform2. The aim of the trip is to provide 18-25 year olds the opportunity to visit a developing country and get involved with global issues of justice and poverty. Whilst in Kenya I lived with a local family for the ten-week duration. I worked with an ongoing conservation project in order to help conserve the ecosystem by improving the livelihoods or communities adjacent to the forest through an environmentally sustainable income. This experience has undoubtedly broadened my perspective of the world. It became clear to me that in Kenya, everyone tried to help one another get by; they were all in the same boat. Here, most people try to just get in their own boat and sail their own course. Over there people know that if they don’t build a boat together, they sink. Volunteering in Kenya in an underprivileged community has undoubtedly developed my life skills and fostered the creativity within me. It has nurtured my ability to be flexible in changing conditions, and to adapt and adjust to new environments and cultures. Platform2- ‘Some People wait for change to happen, other people volunteer.’
All my experiences have made me keen to broaden my knowledge, and given the chance I will do so with full dedication, determination and continuous persistence; I am a motivated, sophisticated and charismatic individual who believes you only get one chance to make a first impression. Accomplishing my objective to obtain a degree in the marketing field and seeing that I have worked towards my potential will be the basis of my success in the future.
January 8th, 2010 at 8:05 pm
Please let me know if this works for you. I removed a bit of unneeded phrasing. You’ve made your points clearly, and I wish you success!
Why do I want to go on to higher education? Ever since I started secondary school at the age of eleven I have wanted to pursue further education at university. Originally I wanted to become a primary school teacher, but after much work experience in that field, I realized that this was not what I wanted to do. Instead, I have developed a great interest in the marketing industry, where I have noticed massive opportunities yet to be exploited; this is where I belong. I believe the industry would challenge my more creative side as well as test my theoretical skills. I’m particularly interested in the more creative advertising side of marketing and the psychology behind it.
I’m very business minded and have many ideas which I can expand on in the future. But before I do so I want to be more knowledgeable about the marketing industry; if I go into this field of work I want to know the characteristics I need to build on for success in this field.
My auntie is also part-owner of a family business, so I have experienced business throughout my life; I believe this has contributed to my passion towards this subject. I have just recently undergone two weeks’ work experience at her business. I helped to create leaflets and posters in order to reach out to the local and wider community. I found this thoroughly interesting and I now want to gain a much deeper insight into the marketing sector.
In October I returned from a 2 ½ month voluntary project in Kenya run by a government scheme called Platform2. The aim of the trip is to provide 18-25 year olds the opportunity to visit a developing country and get involved with global issues of justice and poverty. Whilst in Kenya I lived with a local family for the ten-week duration. I worked with an ongoing conservation project in order to help conserve the ecosystem by improving the livelihoods or communities adjacent to the forest through an environmentally sustainable income. This experience has undoubtedly broadened my perspective of the world. It became clear to me that in Kenya, everyone tried to help one another get by; they were all in the same boat. Here, most people try to just get in their own boat and sail their own course. Over there people know that if they don’t build a boat together, they sink. Volunteering in Kenya in an underprivileged community has undoubtedly developed my life skills and fostered the creativity within me. It has nurtured my ability to be flexible in changing conditions, and to adapt and adjust to new environments and cultures. Platform2- ‘Some People wait for change to happen, other people volunteer.’
All my experiences have made me keen to broaden my knowledge, and given the chance I will do so with full dedication, determination and continuous persistence; I am a motivated, sophisticated and charismatic individual who believes you only get one chance to make a first impression. Accomplishing my objective to obtain a degree in the marketing field and seeing that I have worked towards my potential will be the basis of my success in the future.
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